Anderson Cooper's Boyfriend Kisses Mystery Man, Teaches America About Open Relationships

By: Daniel Villarreal
8.12.2012

This weekend, Ben Maisani—the boyfriend of openly gay CNN anchor Anderson Cooper—kissed some guy in a New York City park and many web commenters began weeping about cheating.

To be blunt, this is stupid.

It's stupid because the general public has no idea if Mr. Maisani and Mr. Cooper are even dating anymore, and (if they are) whether they're in an open relationship. It could be that Mai-Coop (the nickname I've just made up for them) have an arrangement that allows them to get necky with other fellas without it ending their hot and years-long relationship.

It could also be that Mai-Coop aren't in a relationship anymore at all, leaving Maisani free to kiss whoever he likes.

Truth is, in every relationship both partners set boundaries on what's okay and what's not—some partners are okay with their significant others watching porn, some aren't; some guys are okay with their boyfriends commenting on the hotness of other guys, some aren't; and some boyfriends are okay with their boyfriends kissing or doing more with other men, and some aren't.

As long as there's honesty and communication about what goes on, the relationship is just as valid as any other and certainly much more respectable than outright lying to one another and schtupping guys behind one anothers' backs.

But let's say for one second that Mai-Coop are still dating, are in a closed or exclusive relationship and that Maisani kissed this guy without telling Cooper. If that's the case, then it is cheating, but who's to say how big a deal it is.

Perhaps Mai-Coop puts sex with others low on their list of relationship sins. Maybe they think the bigger sins are blatant deceipt, theft and abuse. Perhaps to them, cheating, while problematic and deceptive, is more physical than emotional and not a symptom of huge, relationship-ending problems, but just an expression of lust or need.

Either way, while it's fun to play the voyeur as Maisan kisses some handsome, long-haired guy ripped from the cover of a Harelquin romance novel, we're all better off understanding our own relationships with others than passing off judgement on theirs—hot though it may be.

 

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