Ellen's Feelin' Madonna

By: Gay.com

In a piece of product promotion that redefines subtlety, Ellen regaled a nation with a full-on dance production to Madonna's new single, "4 Minutes". And watching it, I couldn't help but wonder, how close are we to seeing Ellen get a stripper pole on stage?

I don't know; I don't get it. But I know alot of you guys are Ellen fans, so I guess it's worth a watch. It's just so...weird. Like when she's dancing really close to the fat girl in the audience. Are we really a nation of dancers, and only Ellen brings it out in us (and by "us", I mean Ellen's studio audience).

I mean, every time I see a clip of her dancing around, the audience is hooting and hollering like they've never seen a 14 year old boy dance before. Oh, sorry, I forgot - she's a 50 YEAR OLD WOMAN. Well, good for her. That snake-charmer dance of hers has apparently worked its magic on one-leggy blonde...Portia better watch out though. Ellen looks about this close to actually taking a muff dive on to an unsuspecting housewife lucky enough to get an aisle seat. You know I'm right...and you know you'd watch.

Oh -- speaking of Ellen, definitely make it a point to read Popnography's truly intuitive take on why Ellen seems to be coming out of the closet politically on her show in recent weeks.  Read it now on OUT.com's Popnography.