Inventors of Gay: Elsie de Wolfe

Words by Christopher Harrity

Elsie de Wolfe:
Bisexual Adventuress or Flexible Pragmatist?
December 20, 1865 (most likely) – July 12, 1950

Petite and well-born, Elsie made her first splash as an actress, although she was known more for her beautiful costumes than her acting chops. Her longtime relationship with theatrical agent Elisabeth “Bessy” Marbury was so well known that they were referred to around turn-of-the-century Manhattan as “The Bachelors.”

Here they are, Bessy on the left and Elsie on the right.

She was a larger-than-life character, who brazenly bucked societal mores by doing crazy, outlandish things in public, such as greeting guests in a swimsuit as she stood on her head.

Much to her friends’ surprise, Elsie married Sir Charles Mendl (pictured left) and became a global socialite — though it’s clear she married more for the title than love. Her famous home in France, the Villa Trianon, was a small palace next to Versailles. It became a legendary example of between-the-wars glamor (below, right).

Friends with everyone! Including:
Oscar Wilde
The Duke and Duchess of Windsor
Cole Porter
Janet Flanner
Elsa Maxwell

Why we care:
•She virtually invented the career of interior design.
•She invented the all white room (contested by Syrie Maughm).
•She dyed her hair blue—not because she was old, but because it was a radical thing to do.
•She blurred the social lines between high and low society.
•She did handstands on cocktail tables in Parisian nightclubs well into late middle age.
•She regularly fasted, practiced yoga, and cleansed with high colonics.

Quotes:
“You can't take it with you. There are no pockets in a shroud.”
"Be pretty if you can, be witty if you must, but be gracious if it kills you."
And on first seeing the Parthenon, De Wolfe exclaimed, "It's beige—my color!"

"Inventors of Gay" is our series on important people and cultural influences in LGBT history that helped create the culture we enjoy today.