How Did I Get Here?

By: Gay.com
10.7.2008

Life has a funny way of catching us up in its drama so we tend to get moved in every which direction but the direction that matters most, our way. This is your life and you have a right to grab hold of it and create it the way you want.

Here are four activities to help you start creating the direction you want in your life.

Dreams
When we were kids, we loved to dream. We played make-believe all the time. We dreamed of being doctors, astronauts and movie stars. And then we grew up and got so busy with life that we forgot to dream.

I know we can't spend our lives dreaming, but it's the first step in finding what we are passionate about. It allows ourselves to relax and truly think about what we love, what we want to do, where we want to live and what the life is that we want to create.

How do you get back to dreaming? Simple: Find some time and just relax and think about your life. What would make it perfect for you? Allow your mind to come up with tons of ideas and thoughts. No need to judge them, it is all about dreaming...for now.

Vision
Now you have tons of ideas and thoughts about what you'd like your life to be like. It's now time to make it happen. Of course, it isn't going to just show up at your door one day. It is going to take some work. It's time to create a vision of the life you want. Dreams are great, but we now need to add a little reality to them. What is it really you want out of life? We are taking a deeper look at our dreams.

Here is an example: If you see yourself in a mansion by the beach, is it really a mansion you want to live in or do you just want to own your own home? By really looking at your dreams, you can start seeing what it is you really want to set your sights on. Not saying you can't have the mansion, but the first step will be a home of your own.

Once you have a clear vision of your life for the next five years (this doesn't have to be a huge plan, just some major milestones you would like to see) you're ready to step into action and start making it happen.

Goals
How do you make it happen? You set goals. Goals are going to be smaller steps to achieve the items in your vision. They are the stepping stones that move you closer and closer to what you want.

You decided you wanted a home. The first goal you set could be to be to pick a place to live, or to pay off your debt, or even to save up a down payment. It could even be all these goals, because they build on each other to get you to the home you want.

Goals are the small victories that get us to the main vision. You should be excited about each step and happy when you complete it. Think about it: You're one step closer every time you complete a goal you set for yourself.

Reality
As you are in action, you are working away on your goals. Some will take longer than others, but they are all getting you to where you want to be.

As you are achieving more and more, you will realize your dreams are no longer just dreams but a vision for your life. And that vision is being moved into action by all your goals so before you know it, it is reality. Your dreams have moved into reality.

I know this sounds easier said than done, but start out with something small and build on it. As you realize the more success you can achieve, the more you can add to your vision, it will help keep you moving in the right direction instead of just allowing life to take you where it wants.

I would love to hear about one of the dreams or goals you're going to start working on. Leave me a comment telling me what you're committing to today to achieve in your life. I look forward to celebrating your success in the end.

Based in Orlando, Fla., Michael Moniz is a life coach focusing on the needs and goals of the LGBT community.  Holding undergraduate and graduate degrees in communication from Rollins College in Winter Park, Fla., he is also ICF-certified as a professional life coach. As part of his practice, he helps others with self-image, communication skills, self-leadership, and setting and achieving personal and professional goals. Check Michael's website for more information and to schedule private consultations.

Do you have a question about how to improve your life? Send an e-mail to [email protected]

Tags: Lifestyle
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