Top Guns: 10 Military Movies That Sparked Our Gay Fantasies

By: Editors


Get down on your knees right now and thank Jean-Claude Van Damme for appearing in this schlocky sci-fi film that has more unintentional gayness than a Republican National Convention.
In the film, a mostly shirtless Van Damme fights a gang of men who wear furs, sleeveless clothes and fishnets — they call themselves "pirates." Uh-huh. Plunder that booty, y'all!

But as with Commando, the height of this film's homoeroticism comes in the final fight scene (below). We'll let Matt Cale from narrate the action:

"There might be gayer 80s Action films as a whole, but these ten minutes may never be topped. First of all, it’s raining and our warriors are shirtless. Second, they scream and groan with a force not heard in nature. The two sound like they’re in a Frisco bathhouse, not some post-apocalyptic wasteland. They punch, kick, stab, smack, and bludgeon over and over and over again; I’ve never witnessed such madness before. And when J.C. finally moves in for the kill, he plunges his knife deeply into the Pirate, clutching him tightly while remaining a soft and gentle lover. The villain even comes back to life for a few moments; just long enough for Van Damme to slam him — ASS FIRST — on a grappling hook."

You gotta love the early '90s.